Category: Strategic Practice
Understanding Family Dynamics
Henry Senko
Can strategic practice be used within a family to help improve relationships? I had recently received some feedback from one of the participants who had just taken the course on Learning and Corporate Culture. He mentioned how he used the Cultural System Matrix to find common ground to help improve the relationship with his teenage boys.
He went through the exercise to determine each of their ideologies, including his own. They discovered that the boys were coming from a different cultural stance than the father. The father was coming from Level 3, the cooperative stance, and the boys were coming from Level 2, the competitive stance. This helped the father and boys to understand why, at times, they were frustrated with each other.
Recall that the Cultural System Matrix shows three levels that drive the behaviour and thinking of people operating from that level:
- Level 1 (L1) is seen as con~forming, because people follow established ideas and practice: con~form; to form the same shape together. However, at Level 1, people are often conforming by doing what they are being told to do, rather than working together to form the same shape together.
- Level 2 (L2) is seen as com~peting, because people are trying to do better ¾ better than themselves at present, and also better than others. However, at Level 2, people are often competing for resources and against others, even though the Latin form of com~pete means to strive together, not against.
- Level 3 (L3) is seen as co~operating, because there are multiple, diverse stakeholders who cooperate, understand each other’s points of view, and strive to help each other achieve various aspirations: co~operate; to operate, to do things together. However, at Level 3, people are often cooperating by forcing consensus, rather than co~operating by understanding each other’s points of view, and striving to help each other achieve various aspirations.
The boys, coming from Level 2, were competing with each other for the father’s attention, and the father, coming from Level 3, was trying to build consensus amongst all three of them. The boys were not interested in “doing things together”, whereas the father was.
The father and teenage boys went one step further. They did a Cultural Patterns Analysis to determine if there were any cultural patterns that all three of them shared.
Recall that each of the three cultural stances has associated patterns of learning:
- Three patterns of learning found within the con~forming stance (L1): adhering (1), adapting (2), and relating (3)
- Two patterns of learning found within the com~peting stance (L2): experiencing (4) and experimenting (5)
- Two patterns of learning found within the co~operating stance (L3): connecting (6) and dedicating (7)
The father and boys discovered that all three shared experiencing (4) and experimenting (5). Knowing this, they planned activities that allowed them to experience what they liked to do together, such as going to the fair, and to experiment, such as working on an engine. This created a conversation about doing these experiences together. The father reported that this exercise of using strategic practice to understand family dynamics transformed his relationship with his boys. He would have never considered trying this before taking the course.
Corporate Culture, Organizational Change: Strategic Practice
In the last three decades of increasing change and uncertainty, leaders in organizations have been engaging in a myriad of change efforts, some of which have only marginally succeeded, and most of which have failed outright. The unfortunate result of these change efforts is a wasteland of demoralized, exhausted, and jaded employees and leaders.
The reason that most change efforts fail has less to do with what the organization and its people are doing, and more to do with the dynamic of its corporate culture. Like countries, organizations have cultures — corporate cultures — consisting of visible artifacts such as language, structures, history, and ways of working and getting things done. But a critical aspect of a corporate culture is not visible — its ability and capacity to learn. Corporate culture dictates what an organization and its people are allowed to learn, and how they are allowed to learn it. Like an ocean, a corporate culture has strong flows and dynamics that shift and move people, decisions, learning, and actions in certain ways.
Many people simply go with the flow, learning by following others. Others try to initiate change efforts, often going against the flow, challenging and questioning the way things are done around here.
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